image source // photography by maree turner.
these days i can't stop from thinking about the impression one can make. the lasting imprint that one life can create. the ripple effect; the story that your life tells. the unfolding of all of your flaws and goodness and the habits and small wrinkles and dimples–in character and appearance–that make you you. the small details that weave you into the person you have become. then there are the colorful sparks that connect you to others and suddenly make you fall for someone. not just in a lover, but a dear friend too. the awesome magic that makes two people click and just get each other (don't you love that!?). the commonalities and differences and moments that you are there for each other. the memories that you never forget. the times that cement two friends into friends for life. even if you just know each other for a season. it's the magic that was meant for that season and you never forget them. and you have this understanding: we knew each other then–our lives have moved on–but our friendship remains.
i've been contemplating what i've taken from my past and how i am shaped by who i've been connected with. i then carry the wonder of what i'm creating for my future. who i am and what i'm adding to the people in my life. what imprint am i leaving on those around me? and more importantly, is it a good one? is it an impression that will last? does what i do count? these thoughts motivate me to make moments matter.
a tragedy has befallen my friend and my heart is going out to her. it is one of those times where you feel helpless when you so badly wish you could be helpful. if nothing else, my prayers are full of her and i am reminded once again to love the nitty gritty of life. to love the wet shoes piled on the rug by the back door. the legos and the laundry. the warm bodies who land softly and surround me in my bed in the morning hours. i am reminded to love deeper and say what i mean and mean what i say and let grudges go and forgive freely. to make more pancakes. to text funny hellos and scrawl mirrored notes with lipstick. to not hesitate when i feel an urge to do something nice for someone else.
i've been reflecting on how fragile life is. how can i squeeze the most out of the opportunities i've been blessed with? how can i shine right where i am? how can i make life brighter for those who know me? i am inspired to leave an impression. to be the me that i want to be and to try to bring out the best in others. to start a revolution of loveliness in my own home. today i held my boys in my lap, rubbing their soft hair and smoothing their angel cheeks and listening to their honey-laden voices and watching them with more intensity than usual. my amazement directed at their growth and strength and innocence and potential(!!!). what a gift it is to be a mother. to be their mother. not to forget, to be a wife. a wife to my best friend. (what a joy. i have the best job on earth.) i can't help but wonder, what will they remember? and what is it that i am giving to them in my daily living–my attitude, my language, my touches, my praises–as a lasting impression for them to hold onto. it's good for me to set aside the stuff that doesn't matter much to pause and contemplate what does.
your days make up your life.
live them well.